To Eric, I’m a lady in her late fifties. I have no children and have never been married. Both my brother and I were raised by my father, who died when he was forty years old. I’ve been with this person for a long time, and we both love and respect each other.
My father is in poor health and is in his late 80s. I can’t stop wondering that I’ll be alone when my spouse and father both pass away.
My friends from almost two decades ago had gone on to start their own lives. I would rather not explain why I was abandoned. One of my anxieties is that I will be abandoned. I already feel like I’m in mourning. The state of the world in which we live is bleak.
How can I feel better? I’ve attempted various workouts, but my arthritis prevents me from doing them. I would be really thankful for any guidance you could provide.
The upside-down
Stories by
R. Eric Thomas
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To Upside Down, The sensation of melancholy before to a loss is known as anticipatory grieving. Because there isn’t an event to cling to in the present, it can be quite challenging to navigate.
But by admitting that you’re feeling it, you’ve already made the first step toward overcoming it. Don’t be scared to discuss your fear with your father or your spouse. You could feel as though you must manage this alone, which just makes you more afraid of being by yourself once they are gone. You provide them the opportunity to analyze your feelings and possibly gain fresh insights by sharing your love and the issues you’re struggling with.
You and your father could talk more about how to make the time you have together meaningful. Practical planning discussions or methods your partner may support you in your endeavor to improve your mood may also be included in the conversation.
Telling people we love that we’re having a difficult time can even open a door for some light and relief to enter our lives. Saying, “I have planned for what I can plan for and, at this moment, I’m going to be present in my life and with the things that bring me joy,” might also be beneficial.
Discussing your feelings with a counselor would also be beneficial, as will attempting to come up with communities or activities that you can participate in right away to strengthen your support network.
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