Greetings, Miss Manners I need your opinion on how to deal with a persistent problem: individuals taking advantage of my generosity and culinary prowess.
Even while I recognize that not everyone is a good cook, I think they could still volunteer to assist with other kitchen duties. Sadly, some people never do anything but eat the food I’ve bought and prepared whenever they visit, staying till lunch or dinner.
Without making things difficult, how can I politely ask them to assist out by preparing their own food or in some other way?
GENTLE READER: Excuse me, Miss Manners, but isn’t hospitality just sitting back and eating the meal you’ve prepared and purchased?
She is perplexed by your desire for guests to prepare their own meals in your kitchen because she has sent numerous letters pleading with them not to interfere.
She acknowledges that it is excessive to invite oneself to lunch or dinner afterwards. If they eat so much of your food, you can gently respond, “I’m afraid I have other plans for those meals,” even if those plans involve cleaning up the mess they produced.
** ** **
Greetings, Miss Manners I wrote to my aunt to express my gratitude for the generous present she gave me. She expressed how much she enjoyed my letter and hoped I would write to her again this autumn.
Is there any way I might imply that writing me back could improve the caliber and volume of my correspondence with her, or should I obligingly send another letter?
PERSONAL READER: Writing a letter that asks a lot of questions and ends, “I do so look forward to receiving your answers,” could help her get started. It will then be obvious that it is her turn, Miss Manners promises.
It does bind you to a continuous correspondence, but it’s with a kind and giving aunt.
Stories by
Judith Martin
-
Miss Manners: Someone in my walking group is blabbing about my private party plans
-
Miss Manners: Hung up on customer service etiquette? Here are your answers
-
Miss Manners: Courtesy requires you swallow what you’re eating before answering a question
Greetings, Miss Manners One of my coworkers sneezes a lot. Every time she does, someone says, “God bless you!”
I wasn’t trained to say this or anything else when someone sneezed when I was growing up. I therefore remain silent when she sneezes while we are by ourselves. Am I being impolite?
GENTLE READER: Your coworker probably feels that way.
Note: Every piece of content is rigorously reviewed by our team of experienced writers and editors to ensure its accuracy. Our writers use credible sources and adhere to strict fact-checking protocols to verify all claims and data before publication. If an error is identified, we promptly correct it and strive for transparency in all updates, feel free to reach out to us via email. We appreciate your trust and support!