To Lizzy,
Our family is not Santa. We have chosen not to tell our children that Santa gives them gifts on Christmas morning for a number of reasons. Even while we celebrate Christmas, we are not Christians (not that Santa is), and it seems like a weird lie to tell our children that we will have to take back eventually.
While other parents are often shocked that we are robbing our children of this childhood experience, our children could not care less about this. How can we gently let people know that this is our decision?
Apologies, Santa
I apologize, Santa.
Oh, a parent who is really similar to me!
To be completely honest with readers, I have no vested stake in this topic. This question arose after I wrote about my opinions about Santa and recently tweeted about it. I do, therefore, have an opinion.
I’m sorry, Santa. I’m glad you didn’t tell your children falsehoods about Santa Claus.
Receiving gifts from your parents is a miracle in and of itself. In my opinion, the Santa tale, which holds that good boys and girls receive the nicest gifts from an unknown guy, leaves out impoverished children, children who do not celebrate Christmas, and, to be honest, children whose parents cannot afford a Tickle-Me-Elmo-Super-Nintendo or anything else.
However, many adults become alarmed when I say this since it seems like a criticism of their decisions, which is unpleasant. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Parenting is challenging enough.
I decide not to disclose Santa’s existence to my own child. As long as the children are safe, I also firmly believe that parents have the right to raise their own children however they see fit. If someone wants to do Santa in their home, I’m completely cool with that.
Part of the issue with having a Santa-isn’t-real family is that other parents are concerned that your children may tell their own children that Santa isn’t real.
I recently overheard my daughter, who is now five years old, discussing the topic with a few other five-year-olds, and it was enlightening.
Two of the children were aware of the truth about Santa, and they casually told the third. We have instructed her not to tell other children, but I doubt she could resist when another child brought it up, so I decided not to step in and make it any more of a problem than it already was.
After hearing it, the third child commented, “Wow, that’s crazy,” and promptly went on.
That child was completely unconcerned and most likely didn’t think the other two were real. Ultimately, these children continue to believe in mermaids, alicorns, and Elsa, and they frequently utter ridiculous things.
My kid gave me a direct look this morning and asked, “Do you know what?” I noticed the butts of hens emerging!
They all swiftly moved on from the Santa incident, which was a brief segment of a broader discussion.
I used to have assumptions about how this would happen, but seeing it happen gave me a different viewpoint: Even if a child is repeatedly told that Santa isn’t real, they would most likely continue to believe in him until they eventually stop.
And I was somewhat aware of this already! Despite being given the truth since infancy, my own daughter has always been doubtful. But I met him, she’ll say! (a Santa from the mall who she’s been informed is an actor) or How did you manage to remain up thus late? (Well said).
Our culture has a lot of power.
However, I advise against getting into all of that with anxious vacation parents who are merely attempting to create magic for their children. We are all trying our hardest with what we have, after all, and don’t forget about climate change!
We don’t do Santa, but don’t worry, my kids know not to tell. That’s what I would respond if someone asked me this. Cheers to the holidays!
It’s up for debate whether your children will or won’t, but there’s no need to get into that. Go enjoy a joyful, sincere Christmas yourself instead.
I wish you luck!
Lizzy
See Why Tho? for additional information.
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